Bachelor Nation knows it isn’t like Katie Thurston to hold back and now that she’s finally addressing her breakup with John Hersey, the former Bachelorette is spilling the tea.
“He dumped me,” the 31-year-old Bachelor alum began on the “Off the Vine” podcast on Tuesday, August 23. “Technically, we actually broke up twice. The first time no one knew about. … Like a week or two [later], we kind of worked through it and decided to get back together, so I thought we were golden.”
Thurston and Hersey, who she sent home during week two of her Bachelorette season, went public with their romance in November 2021, one month after she ended her engagement to winner Blake Moynes.
“I think it was just unavoidable. … Like, we just got [into] a conversation and at one point, I just said to him, … ‘I know more reasons why you don’t like me than why you love me,’” the former bank marketing manager told Kaitlyn Bristowe. “And that’s a really s—ty feeling.”
Thurston acknowledged that “there’s a lot of give and take when it comes to a relationship” before detailing the “big tipping point” that “always piss [her] off.”
“He said, ’I just really need someone who can enjoy my passions and who wants to watch surf, maybe learn surfing with me,” she continued. “I look at him and I go, ‘You realize I jumped out of a f—king plane three times — twice, solo — skydiving to join him in his passions. Eight hours of ground school, all these things to partake in ‘his passion’ and somehow that was completely ignored and now we’re focused on surfing. At that point, I knew nothing I did was going to ever be good enough. It was really a blessing in disguise. … I think I would have stuck it out a lot longer than I should have. So like, now I’m in a very good place about it. Then, I was probably the saddest I’ve ever been.”
Bristowe was surprised by Thurston’s revelation, noting that she didn’t picture the San Diego resident as someone who would lose herself in a relationship.
“I think I was just a little bit, maybe, in denial at first,” Thurston said. “It was such a big deal to date him so quickly after ending my engagement with Blake. So already there was, like, a lot of public opinions about that situation. But I was like, ‘He’s worth it.’ And, to this day, it’s still a little confusing, because since John and I got to know each other as friends, I was like, ‘You knew who I was before we dated, so why is it that once we started dating, you started to question like, oh, I need someone who’s this?’ I never said I was that. It just really caught me off guard and I just really put, like, all my eggs in one basket with this man, and I don’t want to say I regret it because I think every relationship is a lesson, but it was just six months crash and burn.”
Scroll through for more from Thurston on her split from Hersey — including where they stand now — and her feud with Nick Viall:
“I cried it out. I went to Mexico. They say the best way to get over someone …” Thurston said before Bristowe interjected, “Is to get under someone!” Thurston replied, “She said it, not me.” She then added that while she’s dating, she’s not looking for a relationship at the moment. Sara Jaye Weiss/Shutterstock
“I bought this man a frickin’ travel van. I let this man quit his job. I was like, ‘Whatever you need me to be, I will be.’ Which, in hindsight, that's not healthy, that's not good,” she said. “But it is a little, like, offensive to be like, ‘Damn, I gave you everything,’ and you're still being like, ‘This isn’t working out.’” Thurston added that Hersey is paying her back for the van, but they aren’t exactly friends. “When we broke up, [we] went to a fair together [with our friends] and it was very fine,” she explained. “But then, you know, like, the more time apart, the more those things that were, like, cute and quirky and fun, the more [you’re like], ‘You're annoying the f—k out of me.’ … He would love to stay friends — friends is a strong word, I think, that I would use for him at this time. We’re on good terms. … We’re good enough.” Jordan Strauss/Invision/AP/Shutterstock
Fans may recall Thurston announcing the split via an Instagram Story that read, “Statement: No, we aren’t together.” Hersey then released a more traditional breakup statement. “Sorry, John, you're not gonna like my opinions, but I think being on TV and gaining a platform does change some people. And I was very frustrated with how our breakup was handled after the fact because I do think he cares what these strangers think about him and us,” she said. I was literally, like, cornered into a wall to essentially come out quicker than I wanted to about it. So I said ‘Fine.’” Image Press Agency/NurPhoto/Shutterstock
Thurston made waves in July when she said via TikTok Live that she had the former Bachelor’s number blocked. Viall fired back in a podcast with his girlfriend, Natalie Joy. “Little Miss Natalie is all up in arms over her man,” Thurston said, referencing Joy calling her “Little Miss Katie Thurston” on the “Viall Files” podcast. “She decides — and Nick doesn't stop her — to read a text that I had sent Nick, which was about my feelings [for] Greg [Grippo] back during, like, when my season was airing. And he reads it or allows her to read it on a podcast — a private text sent to Nick as if someway to like, I don't know, destroy me? Who knows? Because I stand by everything I said, like [she] read it and I was like, ‘I’ve been saying that. So like, I don't know what kind of, like, aha moment that you thought that was or whatever.’ But anyway, the reason, ironically, that he is blocked is for sharing my f—king texts to somebody else.” Thurston said she doesn’t know if Viall knows the reason why she blocked him, but added, “The reason he is blocked is for invading my privacy and sharing my texts a year ago. And then here he is doing it on a huge platform.” Image Press Agency/NurPhoto/Shutterstock
Thurston ruled out returning to the Bachelor franchise – and doesn’t want to date within Bachelor Nation either. “I am not dipping into that pool anymore. … I don't want to generalize that much, but it's a certain type,” she said. “Either they're a certain type or the show changes them a little bit and they become a certain type. … I've already done it twice. I'm not interested and, like, there's been some that have slid into my DMs and in talking to them, it's just, like, so cringy.” ABC/Craig Sjodin
Thurston’s breakup with Grippo was contentious, but she admitted that she wonders if it had to be. “We’re not supposed to talk to each other [when the show is airing],” she said. “But I do think if Greg and I had the opportunity to have a private, DM conversation — just like, no cameras, no producers, no, whatever. I feel like everything could have been very different. And I don't mean that romantically, I just mean like, at AFR, it was very intense.” After Bristowe confirmed that Grippo did try to contact the host during the season for an update on whether Thurston was engaged, the season 17 star continued: “I really believe that [if] we had a private talk, slid into the DMs, which I will say — I kind of wonder if he did. I never asked. Obviously, him and I don't talk. But you know how when you click on someone, and there's a message and it says, like, ‘Accept the message.’ So I happened to click messages and it said, ‘Accept message?’ but there was no message. [I think] he unsent it.” ABC/Eric McCandless
ABC/Craig Sjodin
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