The past 50 years have been one heck of a ride for Mariah Carey. In her new memoir, The Meaning of Mariah Carey, the five-time Grammy winner pulls back the curtain on her life and career thus far, giving fans an unprecedented look at one of the most accomplished — and private — stars in music history.
Carey divides the book into four parts: Wayward Child, Sing. Sing., All That Glitters and Emancipation. The first few chapters take readers through her turbulent upbringing in New York to the early days of her career, when she married Sony Music CEO Tommy Mottola, who discovered her in 1988.
The “Hero” singer candidly reflects on the ups and downs of her first marriage and how her affair with New York Yankees player Derek Jeter gave her the courage to leave Mottola in 1997. She also discusses her 2001 breakdown like never before, shedding light on her much-publicized rehab stay, her infamous TRL appearance and, yes, the box-office flop that was Glitter.
There is a rainbow (pun intended) at the end of the storm though. In the last pages of her memoir, Carey speaks highly of her marriage to Nick Cannon and how they have remained amicable since their 2014 split while raising their now-9-year-old twins, Moroccan and Monroe (a.k.a. Roc and Roe or Dem Babies).
While the Songbird Supreme goes into great detail about many aspects of her life, she opted to omit several memories from her book. She does not divulge the reason for her early aughts hospitalization (she previously revealed that she has bipolar disorder but does not mention the diagnosis in her memoir) and also skips over her rumored relationship with Eminem, her short-lived engagement to billionaire businessman James Packer and her current romance with backup dancer Bryan Tanaka.
That said, The Meaning of Mariah Carey is chock-full of once-in-a-lifetime stories. Scroll down to read eight revelations, and pick up a copy in bookstores now for even more!

Carey writes that some of her “earliest memories are of violent moments” involving her brother, Morgan. “By the time I was a toddler, I had developed the instincts to sense when violence was coming,” she explains, describing herself as an “intruder in my own family” and recalling one Christmas where Morgan, their sister, Allison, and their mother, Patricia, “explode[d] in a torrent of verbal abuse.” She also reflects on Allison’s teenage pregnancy (“That was not going to be me”) and history of drug abuse. (Carey’s siblings, from whom she has been estranged for years, have not publicly commented.)
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Soon after Carey and Mottola, now 71, tied the knot in 1993, she felt that he was overbearing. She describes him as “like humidity — inescapable,” adding, “It felt like he was cutting off my circulation, keeping me from my friends and what little ‘family’ I had. I couldn’t talk to anyone that wasn’t under Tommy’s control. I couldn’t go out or do anything with anybody. I couldn’t move freely in my own house.” She writes that she kept a “to go” bag filled with essentials under her bed in case she ever needed to escape from Mottola, who allegedly “monitored [her] — minute by minute, day after day, year after year.” (The music executive has not publicly responded to his ex-wife’s claims, but he told Page Six earlier this month that he wishes “her and her family only the very best.”)
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Although Carey insists she had “a lot of respect” for Mottola because he “protected” her from her “dysfunctional family,” she second-guessed walking down the aisle with him. “Many reasonable people questioned why I married Tommy. But none of them questioned the decision more than I did,” she writes. She also looks back on their wedding day, saying she “saw no way out” and “never dreamed of getting married” young. (Carey and Mottola were 23 and 43, respectively, at the time.)
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Carey writes that she wanted “to be like Peter Pan and fly the f--k away” from Mottola, so after she met Jeter, now 46, at a dinner in the mid-‘90s, she saw an opportunity. After finding out that the MLB star also had biracial parents, she fell head over heels. They exchanged numbers and began sneaking around New York City together. “Derek was only the second person I had slept with ever (coincidentally, his number was 2 on the Yankees),” she writes. Carey thought Jeter was her “soulmate” at the time because he was proof that she “could have something beautiful on the other side of the hell that was [her] marriage.” Their relationship ended up being brief, but the pop diva thanks the athlete in her book for being “the catalyst [she] needed to get out from under Tommy’s crippling control.”
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In between sessions for her 1995 album, Daydream, Carey wrote, produced and recorded background vocals for the alternative rock band Chick’s sole record, Someone’s Ugly Daughter. “I wanted to break free, let loose, and express my misery — but I also wanted to laugh. I totally looked forward to doing my alter-ego band sessions after Daydream each night,” she writes. (Carey tweeted earlier this week that she is “on a quest to unearth the version of this album with my lead vocals and will not stop” until it’s found.)

Carey accuses her ex-husband of using “all his power and connections to punish” her by sabotaging her 2001 movie, which premiered after their 1998 divorce and her 2000 departure from Sony Music. “Much of what went wrong with Glitter led back to Tommy. He was angry,” she remembers.
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Three years after seeing Canon’s movie Drumline, Carey had a chance to meet the All That alum, now 39, when he presented her with a Teen Choice Award in 2005. They started talking on the phone soon after and went on to marry in 2008. “I sincerely thought I would never have kids. Our relationship changed that,” Carey writes, explaining that she and Cannon “got married so quickly” because they wanted to start a family.
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After becoming parents in 2011, Carey and Cannon’s marriage began to struggle. “Making the necessary adult adjustments to being working parents in entertainment took its toll on our relationship, and the end of our marriage came fast, as it began,” she writes. Although Carey admits that she and the actor likely “could have worked it out,” their “egos and emotions got inflamed.” They divorced in 2016.
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